Restoration....God's way.

Lately I have been reflecting on the work God is doing in my life. It hasn't been this big bright angels singing hallelujah from the sky moment, but as I look back now, it has been a slow, sometimes easy, sometimes hard transformation. It has taken some willingness on my part to reach out in faith and trust that God is in control. And for this control freak, that is really difficult to do. ;)

I made a decision a couple of years ago that I thought was God's will. Now, I am not so sure it was God's will or if he just took my choice and used it for his good. During those years I worked on healing the pain in my life. And when I say years, I do literally mean YEARS. I justified myself, I justified my choices and I blamed all those around me for the pain that was caused me. And then after my tantrum, I just got really still on the issue and allowed God to do a work on my heart.

Then came the restoration. The restoration part was also slow and a bit painful, but overall, I knew God was working it out. And then on this past Sunday God laid it on my heart that it was time for ME to ask for forgiveness in my attitude and my part in the conflict. Now again, if you know me, asking for forgiveness is HARD HARD HARD. I have this thing called pride that gets me every time. But it was clear to me that it was what God was asking me to do. And, honestly, I fear outright disobedience to God. I know I disobey the Lord, we all do at times, don't we? But this was like God's voice in my ear and I was not going to turn around and tell my Daddy "no".

So, again, I reached out in faith and asked for forgiveness. It didn't matter anymore who said or did what. It just mattered that I was obedient in what God had asked of me. And today I have pure joy in the fact that restoration done God's way is SOOOOO much better than anything I could have ever planned myself.

Today, I am able to not judge, not criticize and not fear. I am able to see the good, not the bad. I am able to be thankful for the time I am given and not be remorseful for the time I have wasted. I am able to offer my children a view of forgiveness and so much more as they too will benefit from the works God has done in my life.

Restoration, God's way, feels so good!