So, I don't often speak of my childhood days. I guess I often think those words "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all". But sometimes I talk about it as a "fill in" so to speak to help my friends understand me a bit better.

My parents aren't not the June and Ward Cleaver type by any means. They married young, divorced soon and fought from there on out. I don't have a relationship with either of them at this time in my adulthood and it is not something I am proud of, it just is what it is. I used to try very hard to be a perfect child so that maybe I could convince these people to love me. But alas, that just left me as one burnt out perfectionist still starved for affection and attention.

I had never really understood a parents unconditional love and, admittedly therefore I have struggled in the past to comprehend God's unconditional love. But, then the most amazing thing happened to me.... I moved to Texas and God gave me 3 most amazing women as my friends. But, quickly they became so much more than my friends. They are my mentors, yes, but they are so much more than that, they are my FAMILY. It was as if God was using them to show me unconditional love. So that by experiencing it here on earth, I could grasp the concept of how HE loves me.

Today they took me out for my birthday lunch (yeah, sometimes we are a little late, but we work it in!) and they spoiled me rotten! I can't even describe the feelings in my heart as I listened to the encouraging, uplifting and complimenting words they used when they spoke to me/about me. In all my years of life on this earth, no one has ever loved me like they do OR cared for me in this way. Well, maybe Jay and my children, but that's a different kind of love we can talk about in another blog. =)

I have been blessed to have had them for 6 years now and it amazes me that with the time that passes, I almost forget that I used to not understand unconditional love. I almost forget that I used to be a people pleasing perfectionist striving to MAKE people love me. Isn't that amazing?

I certainly don't know what I did to deserve them, but they would tell me that it's not because I deserve anything, it's simply because God loves me that He blesses me so.

For the blessing of these women I am truly grateful! I love them each UNCONDITIONALLY!

Things I have learned from watching my husband and my children

Here are some of the things my husband and my children have taught me over the last 14 years:

*If daddy says I am beautiful, then obviously I must be beautiful. Duh, because daddy says so!
*If daddy says you are smart, well isn't daddy the smartest man I know? He must be right!
*If I am scared, then daddy can make all the monsters go away.
*Daddy's snuggles are better than anyone elses in the world.
*Dad's stand on their word, if they say they will, then they will.
*Even though it's not his idea of fun, he will do it anyway just to spend time with one of his favorite people in the world (me!).
*Dad will fight anyone or anything that tries to harm me...no questions asked.
*When there are 3 children, Daddy always knows how to make ME feel special. I AM his favorite, right?
*My daddy laughs because he loves me, my daddy cries because he loves me and my daddy prays daily because he loves me!


Good lessons being learned around here!

Father's Day

Today I get to blog/brag/blog about my husband. What a wonderful father he is! It's funny, our kids love their dad so much, but I don't think they truly grasp how blessed they are to have him. It may not be until they are parents themselves, they will finally grasp the love that this man has for them.

So, at dinner I asked the kids to tell Jay what they loved most about him. Jayson said he loves how Jay tries to do things with him that he likes (like playing tennis in 100 degree weather) and Hunter said there were so many things she couldn't begin to name one, it was too long of a list. And Katie said he was the best dad ever and that she was "now going to cry happy tears!" Well, we all cried happy tears over that! =)

I, too, love many things about my husband. Too many to list....but one of the best things about him is that he places God at the head of our household. Because he is a wise man and he knows that by building our home on the rock, it will stand firm!

Happy Father's Day honey! You are truly one in a million!

YAY for Hunter!

Hunter has made Junior Dance Company! Whoooo Hoooo! She is over the moon and back with happiness. And of course, her daddy and I are so stinkin proud of her.

A friend asked her today "So Hunter do you think you made it because you worked hard or because God made you with a special gift. OR, do you think it was both?" Hunter replied "both" and I agree with her. She definitely worked hard. For a little girl with only 1 little musical theater class and a bit of ballet as a toddler, she really had to step it up a notch this past year. BUT, without the God given talent, the hard work would have been for naught.

Through this year Hunter has learned some valuable things:
1) if you love something, you don't mind doing it over and over and over
2) if you want something bad enough you have to work hard for it
3) if you ask God to lead you throughout the journey, the journey will go much smoother
4) prayer is a very valuable tool when you are frustrated, scared or even excited!

So, the first leg of the journey begins for Hunter in a few weeks. We have asked her what her next goal is....she has a year to work towards it. Let's see if she remembers the things she learned and uses her knowledge toward her new goal.

My girls

This weekend was the big recital for our dance studio. The girls have worked all year for their chance to perform in front of friends and family. I have watched them since September and I too have waited anxiously to see them "under the lights". My grandma even came into town just to watch them dance.

The recital went well and we had fun watching friends dance to their songs too. It's always fun to watch others perform. All the girls did a great job.


My little Katie sassed up the stage with her attitude and smile. That child loves the spotlight and is not the least bit shy. I have to say that must be the Hatfield coming out in her. I think her Grammy would have been her biggest fan tonight!

As a mom I did a total of 14 costume changes and 14 hair changes. That's a LOT for this dance mom novice. At one point I looked at Hunter and asked her (just because I was curious) "is this worth it to you? Does this make you happier than anything in the world? Is this chaos and running around fun for you?" And my sweet angel looked me right in the eye and said "YES!!!"

You see, on this day last year (recital day) my Hunter looked at me and said "I want to be in that dance company" And considering she had only taken one little rec class, I told her that I thought she could make it but that she would have to start working at it and consider taking another class or two. One year ago she set a goal and has worked week after week on perfecting her technique and adding her sass to her dancing. She took a total of 5 classes this year just to get ready for company tryouts. Even when she had surgery and was restricted, she still went to class and walked through all the dances.

We find out in hours whether she made it or not. Honestly, we are all on pins and needles. We realize that with just 1 year of ballet and 1 year of jazz this may not be her year. And we will handle that disappointment if we must. But we are so proud of her for her hard work and she certainly showed she was ready tonight. She is such a beautiful, graceful dancer!

My husband

I love my husband and there are so many reasons why. But I thought I would list a few because everyone needs an appreciation list:

1) He is such a good/hands on dad.
2) He is very generous and willing to sacrifice so another's needs can be met over a want he might have.
3) He always puts gas in my car.
4) He always takes out the trash.
5) He always helps with laundry/dishes/housework/carpool.......and you name it!


I can go on but you get the point. I am an amazingly blessed woman. I am thankful for my husband and I am thankful that he puts up with me!

The thing I love most.......

Today Hunter and I had our Girl Talk Bible study and it was our turn to facilitate. Since we are a week away from Mother's day, I asked the girls and the moms to share one thing that they love the most about mom/daughter. It was so wonderful hearing these affirmations from both the daughters and the mothers.

The girls in our group are such amazing, smart young women. They have hearts for the Lord and hearts for their families. I heard affirmations like: "the thing I love most about my mom is how she cares for our family, how she is always there for me, how she hangs out with me" And my personal favorite (quote from my own daughter) was "I love everything about my mom, it's too hard to choose one" WOW! Start the tears! What did I do to deserve that one? That was the best mother's day gift anyone could ever give me. To know that this crazy mess of a woman is loved so unconditionally by a child just blows me away. I am so grateful to be a mom!